Most of us will experience the difficulty of forgiving those who have hurt us. We know the biblical teaching is to forgive others, but sometimes our wounds are so deep, we feel unable to let go of the hurt. While forgiveness can be difficult, it is not impossible in God. We need to remember that: ‘It is for freedom that Christ has set us free’ (Galatians 5:1), and Christ wants us to walk in the freedom of forgiveness.
This page and video give an introduction to the topic. For a longer read click the button below.
Ken Sande in his book ‘The Peacemaker’ puts our struggle to forgive well:
It is impossible to truly forgive others in your own strength, especially when they have hurt you deeply or betrayed your trust. You can try not to think about what they did or stuff your feelings deep inside and put on a false smile when you see them. But unless your heart is cleansed and changed by God, the memories and the feelings will still be lurking in the background, poisoning your thoughts and words, and preventing the rebuilding of trust and relationship. There is only one way to overcome these barriers, and that is to admit that you cannot forgive in your own strength and that you desperately need God to come in and change your heart.
With God’s help, I was able to come to a place of forgiveness, and my testimony is that the feeling of freedom that comes with forgiveness is precious and worth seeking. Do not let Satan rob you of joy, but allow God to work in your heart to set you free. In the attached pdf is my experience of how to move from a place of unforgiveness, to forgiveness, and then (if appropriate) to reconciliation.